Today I spent the afternoon of my off day watching episode after episode of What Not to Wear and the series premier of Big Brooklyn Style. I love the TLC channel. Especially recently, I love how they have been airing many shows that are geared towards real people that may not be the perfect hour glass figure who can wear every piece of clothing they find.

What Not to Wear's Clinton and Stacy, pull real people who do not have thousands of dollars to spend on clothes and show them what looks good on THEM. Not that looks good on the celebrity super models who have designers and stylists help them out everyday. They do not try to drain all individuality and personal style of those people to make them conform to what is "in" right now. Not only are they fashion gurus, they are also psychologists. Clinton and Stacy help people who were the larger one in their groups of friends and the gangly nerdy girl and guy on the math team who couldn't break a hundred pounds. They help the stay at home mom who has a hard time feeling pretty and the very fit and active former army woman who finds it hard to dress her athletic shape. They listen to their stories and make them all feel beautiful. You can see the real change in each person by the end of each show. They find their confidence and that is beautiful in itself.

I love it.

I am tired of seeing my friends having to face such hard times. It seems to be happening a lot recently. God has a plan and a reason, I just hope they will be able to see that as well.

Many times, when people die,  others often say "He was a good man."
Mr. Chet was more than just a 'good man.' He was a sweet, kind, father who was more Christ like than almost anyone I know. I didn't know him very well, but every time I saw him or was at his house, he always hugged me and told me that he was glad that I was Cole's friend and that I could be there for him.

I am praying for the Humphries and Beltline. They have had a rough past year.

Here is a list of little things I want to do this summer: (It its time to "loosen up" as my Dad says)


Take a day trip to the beach
Do a pull-up
Walk on my hands
Have lots of camp fires
Some how sneak another dog into my life
skinny dip (yeah, its weird)
read
love myself more




Okay, maybe a lot of those things aren't normal people's idea of being less up-tight. But hey, They sound good to me.

You gave up on me, remember? You gave up on me when I was trying, when I needed someone to believe in me.

brothers

You don't have to be in the same place to be family, You don't even have to be in the same family to be family. I have always known this, I just have seen it at work recently more than others.

 Things happen. Not all of them are necessarily bad things, just things that happen in people's lives that cause them to go one direction or another. For example, there has been some of these things that have happened with some members of my department, and they have now moved to another neighboring volunteer department. I miss them. I miss them so much. I miss seeing them everyday and cooking hot dogs and late nights that usually end up with someone in trouble or slightly injured. But, we are still family. A brotherhood is not separated into individual entities, but is one, as a whole. We still call each other and pick on each other and are always there if one of us is in need.
After I found out that I passed my EMT exam today, one of my brothers who moved departments was the very first person I called, because I knew he would be excited and proud of me. We are there to support and laugh and celebrate and cry with each other, if need be.  They could all move to opposite ends of the country tomorrow, I would hate it, but if one of them needed something, there is no doubt in my mind that all of us would be on the first plane out of town.
Families fight. It happens. It doesn't mean you love someone less. But we are still brothers. We are still sisters. We are a family.

should have

I should have won
I should have budged
I should have spilled
I should have opened
I should have not
But I didn't. 

NOW

I am trying to prepare myself for the burn building I am about to go and train in.
I am nervous. Not of the fire, but of doing something wrong.

* "Black then blue, or else you'll be black and blue."
*watch for rapidly dropping black smoke
*stay with your brother

I got this. Its going to be amazing.

Also, I became and official certified lifeguard today. YAYYYY